Friday, October 15, 2004

During this time of "High Alert" I drive pas the electronic signs entreating us to report suspicious activity. What exactly is suspicious activity? I've seen all sorts of things as I drive along inside the Beltway: people eating bowls of chili, putting on makeup, performing oral sex, shaving, curling their hair, talking on cell phones while drinking a cup of coffee, hitting their children, filling in the crossword puzzle, using both hands to speak in sign language, and counting large amounts of money. Those are common things; common can't be suspicious. Right?

Today I saw something NEW. Could it be suspicious enough to call the 1-800 number to Homeland Security? The guy next to me was picking his nose but he wasn't eating the boogers or wiping them on his car door. He was carefully putting each one inside his briefcase. Was he placing them on a special file folder to hide in the files of some unsuspecting coworker? Is this some sort of dirty bomb?

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Why, Yes, that was a whiney complaint by a woman with bronchitis.

Monday, October 04, 2004

If there was a part of my body that I could change it wouldn't be my thighs or my toes or my nose. I would adjust my immune system and the way my body protects itself. I do understand the way the system is supposed to work to keep me healthy. I do! It's just that my system is hypersensitive. One of the technical descriptions includes the word spastic which says a lot about the whole thing. My main affected system is breathing though my skin also reacts swiftly and out of proportion to irritants.

It goes like this: I breathe in sharply or the air is dry or I laugh too hard and it irritates my lungs. They start to cough to expel the irritant. The cough that is supposed to expel the irritant is perceived by my body as an irritant; it coughs even harder. The irritant/cough escalates until I am gasping or gagging and my throat and chest hurt.

It sucks. It's tiring. And no, I don't smoke.